Watching and waiting

Today is day eight after My's diagnosis.

Camping trip was successful. She hiked 2.5 miles with me around the lake. She wagged her tail and loved all the attention that was lavished on her. She loved being wrapped in her warm, borrowed blanket and slept for a couple hours in the tent before we went to bed each night. Thank goodness for the rigid door of our tent.

We went to the holistic vet on Monday evening. It was in a lovely part of south Nampa, very picturesque. An excellent place for a vet's office, I think. The floors in the waiting room were bamboo with Chinese symbols as a border. Dr. Ault was matter of fact and brusque. She did a physical exam and then some kinesthetic work. She prescribed several more supplements to add to the drugs she's taking. She's lost 7 pounds in the last 7 days, we can presume is fluid loss from the diuretic.

I still am filled with anxiety. I want to do the right thing by my beloved Miss My...but I have to be truthful, I am $1000 in so far in the last two months and I don't know how much more is healthy for either of us. The expenditure of money makes me anxious, and the anxiety over being anxious over the expenditure is real as well. I'm watching her every move...wondering if she's breathing too hard or is too hot in this oppressive heat.

Then there is Sadie. She's had a hard time walking in the house...She did great camping. She seemed able to get around quite well on the dirt and asphalt when camping. She swam a ton, did well in the life jacket (in the water only...She froze up and fell on her side like she was dead when we out it on her on land. Kind of sadly hilarious.) I'm hoping she just needs to get used to being back in the house and navigating between the yoga mats we have all over.

I feel like when I concentrate on one if them I am forgetting the other one. Again, more anxiety. I want to show then equal love. But their needs are so different. And Sadie hasn't even been to vet. Dear God, what would happen if I took her in? Jeebus! Again, the balance between what I want to provide for them and their age is so hard to maintain.

I love them so much...I hope that I may make the correct decisions for them both and maintain our love, our lives, and our hearts without regrets.